


Follow Like Alice

by IrisTheVirus93



Series: A Song Of Fire And Ice [47]
Category: Frostiron - Fandom
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Brother-Sister Relationships, Brotherly Angst, Brotherly Love, Bruce Banner & Tony Stark Friendship, Bucky Barnes & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Carol Danvers & Steve Rogers Friendship, Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Dreams, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, James "Rhodey" Rhodes & Tony Stark Friendship, M/M, Reconciliation, Sigrid and Magni-centric, Sigrid is a empath, Sigrid understands the depression now, Steve Rogers & Sam Wilson Friendship, Tony Feels, Tony Stark-centric, Tony has a lot of making up to do, coming to terms, making amends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-20
Updated: 2019-12-08
Packaged: 2020-10-24 12:24:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 4,443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20705969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IrisTheVirus93/pseuds/IrisTheVirus93
Summary: Sigrid talks to Magnus each time Tony makes amends.





	1. Bruce Banner

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Intoxic](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Intoxic/gifts).

> For Intoxic.
> 
> Always complimenting my work and is the reason I have some good ideas!
> 
> Thank you. I feel like you're my number one fan<3

Tony paced about this for days since his little outing with Sigrid. Since she mentioned Magni. Since HE spoke about Magni. He wanted to go home with Sigrid that day but like he said, he still had some things to fix. He needed to completely make amends. He had to.

"Okay." Tony took a deep breath. "Better start with the Big Guy."

+

Sigrid blinked her eyes. She looked around. She saw the little boy again. Tony had told her Loki had miscarried with Magni. So why was he her same age? Sigrid shook her head. It was a dream. It didn't matter. She walked towards the brother she never knew. Covered in white clothing.

"My name is Sigrid." Sigrid introduced herself.

"I think my name is Magni." The boy replied.

"It is. I know you."

"How?"

"You're the brother who didn't get to breathe."

"I've died?"

"Yes. A long time ago. Mama and Daddy were very upset over it but they're starting to get better."

Magni looks down. Sigrid reaches over and holds his hand.

"It's no one's fault. Daddy says sometimes you're just unlucky in life." Sigrid reassured him and he smiled.

+

"We need to talk." Tony announces in Bruce's lab.

"About?" Bruce arched an eyebrow. "I swear to God, Tony. I am not making a robot Thor. Look what happened with Ultron and Vision."

"Goddamn it, why won't anyone let it die?"

"Because Ultron dropped a city from the sky and Vision used to be JARVIS."

Tony smacked his forehead and took a deep breath.

"Bruce, that's not why I'm here." Tony rolled his eyes.

"Oh." Bruce bit his lip. "Then why? it's been a while."

"I know and I have things that need to be addressed."

"I'm all ears then."

"Good. Because you probably know what I want to say."

"I believe I do."

The two geniuses sat across each other in silence for a while. There wasn't tension but there was a strong awkwardness between them.

"I don't know how to say sorry." Tony finally spoke. "I know just saying it isn't enough but I have to start with you, Bruce. Not because you're one of my best friends but because it all started the moment I punched you. I won't make up excuses like how me and Loki were in a dark place or we've been going down a dark road for a while. That doesn't justify my assaulting you. Don't forgive me. Don't make amends with me. Just hear me out and let me talk."

Tony then started to ramble and Bruce let him. He always knew Tony never meant it. He had become a hardcore alcoholic. He relapsed to who he used to be. Except he wasn't sleeping around this time. Tony knew he screwed up the moment he put his hands on Bruce.

"You should have let the Other Guy take me out." Tony breathed. "It would have saved us from a lot of other shit that went down."

"Don't say that, Tony." Bruce sighed. "You were out of your mind."

"Don't cover for me."

"I'm not. I know you and I know how you are with Loki."

"I spoke to Sigrid and I need to go home. I don't even know my son. But I won't go home until I fix everything."

"For the record, I always believed in you, Tony. Like you said, you're one of my best friends but I swear to god, if there is a next time, I might kill you."

"I'll keep you to that, buddy."

Bruce hugged Tony suddenly and it wasn't like a normal hug. It was a heartbreaking one. One you give someone when they've been away overseas for a long time. As if Bruce hasn't seen Tony in years.

But he was back now.


	2. Jennifer Walters

"We have a baby brother." Sigrid told Magni. "His name is Magnus."

"That sounds like my name." Magni's eyes sparkled.

"You've never been forgotten, I know that now."

"What does he look like?"

"He looks like Daddy."

"Like me?"

"Yes."

Sigrid and Magni held hands. They were getting to be very close; almost like best friends.

+

"Give me one damn good reason why I shouldn't rip your head off, Tony." Jennifer growled.

"I am a father of two fascinating children?" Tony tried to break the ice.

"I swear to god, Tony."

"Okay, I admit. That was a very bad joke."

Jennifer crossed her arms as she stared intently at Tony. He was typically a strong man but no man could match up to She-Hulk. Just like no human could match up to The Hulk himself. Walters and Banner. Two two were human tanks. A lot of drama happened back then. For a while.

Tony takes a deep breath and thinks.

Jennifer was going to help Thor get custody of Sigrid.

Tony assaulted her cousin.

She knows about what happened with Loki.

She has seen how Sigrid grew up.

And the list goes on.

"I don't even know how to start this with you." Tony admitted.

"Why bother making amends with me?" Jennifer snapped.

Tony pauses. Then takes a deep breath.

"I'm making the amends with you because you've been there." Tony sighs. "From the beginning, Jen."

"Tony-" Jennifer doesn't know what to say.

"You knew Loki and I weren't in good shape. That's why you kept getting on us. That's why you were going to help Jane and Thor take Sigrid from us. Back then, I was pissed, sure. But I understand better now. I really do. At the time, it was the best option."

Jennifer's expression suddenly softened. Never in a million lifetimes would Jennifer ever expect Tony to say this.

"I'm trying. I really am. Loki shaped up real good but me, I'm still fucking up in ways I don't want to confront but I have to." Tony's voice shook. "For Magnus. For Sigrid. For Magni."

Jennifer uncrossed her arms and patted Tony on the shoulder. Not completely as a friend but as a kind soul.

"And you're doing wonders." Jennifer smiled for the first time since Tony started talking.


	3. James Buchanan Barnes

"How is Mama and Daddy?" Magni asked Sigrid.

Sigrid doesn't say anything for a long time.

+

"What is it, Stark?" Bucky asks.

"We need to make amends." Tony sighed.

"Over this Loki thing?"

"And Siberia."

Bucky doesn't say anything for a long time. Tony doesn't say anything either. Tony needed to make amends over this ugly situation and he knew somewhere deep inside, Siberia and the Accords have been in the back of Bucky's mind even though things have long been cleared up.

"I meant it." Bucky said. "When I said I remember them all."

"I know that now." Tony nodded.

"I remember your mom the most. She was just the bystander."

Tony just nods again. He still doesn't want to talk about his mom's murder. It still hurts.

"Let me ask you something." Tony gulped. "Did you ever have bad problems with Steve?"

"I mean it was like 20s, 30s, 40s." Bucky chuckled to himself. "You can imagine how bad it was back then. Especially when Steve was a little guy."

"I got that much. It's insulting you think I'm an idiot."

"You make it so easy, Stark. Howard did too."

Tony rolled his eyes. At least, they could occasionally joke.

"I meant did it ever get real bad between you and Steve?" Tony asked again.

Bucky doesn't say anything at first.

"We broke up once." Bucky sighs, defeated by life.

"Get out of here." Tony scoffs. "You're pulling my leg."

"I'm serious. Steve's dad died and we broke up. I mean we got back together two weeks later and I even recently asked if I ever hit him back then because we've been hurting ever since your ordeal with Loki happened."

Tony goes quiet. Bucky keeps talking.

"I mean. He says I never did but I can't help but feel maybe something happened." Bucky just rants. "Did you know Steve's dad used to try to beat the gay out of him? He was already sickly and the beatings always nearly killed Steve. He'd get more aggressive because Steve's mom would use herself as a wall between them. He'd always stop me when I would try to throw my fists up, ya know."

Bucky finally goes quiet. He doesn't know what to say anymore.

"I hated you." Tony says. "God, I fucking hated you. I mean you killed my parents and Steve covered for you. Fought for you. Lived for you. Even after things cleared up, I just hated you so much. You can imagine how much red I would see every time you came at me with all this bullshit going on."

"I'm easy to hate." Bucky shrugged his shoulders. "It's a gift."

"But you're right, Barnes. All of this shit, you're right. And I'm fucking trying."

"It's a long road, Stark."

"So is recovering from Hydra."

The men looked at each other. Tony forgave Bucky. He knows now. It wasn't Bucky's fault. It can't be someone's fault when they lost their free will long ago.

"If it means anything, Tony." Bucky pats Tony's back. "You're a damn good man and that is something Howard will never take from you."

"Thanks." Tony smiled.


	4. Natasha Romanov & Clint Barton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SORRY FOR DISAPPEARING.
> 
> I HAVE RETURNED.

"Did I say something wrong?" Magni asks.

"No, you didn't." Sigrid sighs.

"What is it?"

"Things are weird right now."

+

Tony wasn't completely sure why he was here. Nothing was technically done to Natasha and Clint but here he was, ready to make amends with the spies.

"Why are you here?" Clint broke the ice.

"My thoughts exactly." Tony muttered.

"Tony, you don't actually have to apologize to us. Nothing was done." Natasha spoke softly.

"I feel the need to be here with you two." Tony sighs.

"There's no reason." Natasha's face was kind but impatient.

Tony knew Natasha was right. He didn't have a falling out with them. Natasha sided with him when the Accords happened. Clint took no hard feelings when he was sent to the Raft back then. 

However, Tony Stark was many things but a fool, he was not.

He knew Natasha had history with Bucky. He knew Clint and Natasha were thick as thieves. And he knew they would side with Bucky no matter what.

He knew Natasha didn't tolerate beaters. He knew Clint couldn't stand abuse. And he knew they wouldn't break a sweat beating him unconscious.

"I talked to Barnes a bunch of times.." Tony started to say.

"We heard." The spies said in union.

"I will live with what I have done but I won't let it define me." Tony cleared his throat. "And I won't let it destroy the people I love and care about."

"Good." Clint nodded.

"Because if you do, we'll have to kill you." Natasha added.

"Glad I could always count on you two." Tony smiled.


	5. James "Rhodey" Rhodes

Magni doesn't say anything. He may have died a long time ago but he knew Sigrid was hurting. A strange feeling boiled up in his chest. He never knew emotions. How could he? He died before he really lived. But Sigrid was his sister. And there was something about her that woke him up. And there was only one thing he could think of.

Sigrid cried when Magni embraced her and gave her the tightest hug she has ever gotten in her life.

+

Rhodey and Tony have been friends for a long time. He has seen Tony through the darkest parts of his life. He has stayed by Tony's side through the hardest moments in his life. He was there when his parents had died. He was there when the drinking and the sex and the drugs started. He was there through the years of womanizing and partying. Then the abduction happened. He was there when Tony became Iron Man.

But he's been there during the good times too.

The forming of the Avengers. Tony falling in love with Loki. The birth of Sigrid. Saving the world a couple times. Destroying Ultron. Defeating Thanos.

But then, the rest is history.

"What is this I'm hearing of apologies?" Rhodey asked.

"I'm making amends." Tony replied. "What's wrong with that?"

"You're supposed to be getting better."

"Think of this as my therapy."

"Is this Sam's idea?"

"Hey, he may be the Avengers' therapist but I have some good ideas too."

"I swear to god, Tony."

Tony smiled. Rhodey didn't want to smile but he couldn't help it. They were thick as thieves.

"It's time for yours, Rhodes." Tony suddenly stopped.

"My what?" Rhodey arched an eyebrow.

"I'm sorry. I am, Rhodey."

"Tony, stop."

"Just listen to me, okay?"

"Okay."

"You've been there for a long time. Even when Loki and I were fighting with Thor and Jane and Jen. Even when..."

Tony pauses for a moment. Rhodey doesn't rush him. He knows what Tony means.

"Then the relapsing and the new baby. I know it's always been hard. Hell, you saw me at one of the worse moments of my life when we lost Magni. But I never once thought about how much it hurt you. How much pressure was on your shoulders. Because despite me being this complete disaster, you never left my side. You didn't leave me during the Accords. You didn't leave me when I was creating Ultron. Hell, you didn't leave me when Loki was still our enemy and I started sleeping with him. Sometimes I think I couldn't do it if you weren't there suffering because of our friendship." Tony said, breathlessly.

"Tony, don't make it sound like I had to. You're my best friend." Rhodey sighed.

"You deserve more than me, Rhodes. But this is a thank you too. Because never once did I ever thank you for being the person I really needed."

Rhodey embraced Tony hard. He was proud of him. He quit everything on his own the first time. He learned to better himself the second time. He was a good father and he was trying to correct his mistakes. He was doing everything Rhodey knew he could do.

"You're forgiven because I'm so damn proud of you, Tony." Rhodey laughed.

Tony didn't say anything. He just gave a teary smile.


	6. Steve Rogers

Sigrid loved Magnus. She truly did but he was only a baby. There wasn't a bond like this yet. He didn't understand what was going on around them. He cried but it wasn't sadness. He didn't know emotions yet. Then, there was Magni who was closer in age but he had been dead for a while. He grew like Sigrid did but he died before he was even alive.

But none of it mattered because for the first time in a while, Sigrid wasn't alone and embraced Magni just as tightly.

+

"I heard you and Bucky talked." Steve causally brought up with Tony.

"That we did." Tony nodded. "And we didn't kill each other."

Steve couldn't help but roll his eyes.

"Joking aside, we did make some amends." Tony continued.

"You didn't need to." Steve cleared his throat.

"Yeah but you know there was still some animosity between us."

"I know."

The two stay silent for a moment.

"I need to talk to you." Tony says.

"I heard you've been talking to a bunch of us." Steve acknowledged.

"Yeah. I'm working on myself and I am fixing the things I've broken with Loki and the kids."

"I know."

"But I need to fix things outside of us too."

"Hence the talks."

"Yeah."

The two looked at each other. They've been through a lot of ups and downs. They've had falling outs and making ups. Arguments and agreements. Discussions and disagreements. But this was something Tony really needed to fix.

"Barnes told me about a time you two broke up." Tony brought up.

"Did he?" Steve was taken back.

"Yeah but he doesn't seem to have the best memories about that time."

"Yeah, it's kinda hazy to him still."

"He wonders if it was like me and Loki."

"Why?"

"Apparently, our...ordeal triggered you."

Steve sighed. Carol was right. He should have told Bucky but he chose to use sex instead and now, it's backfiring.

"It wasn't like that, Tony." Steve sighed. "It really wasn't. I just had a moment and broke up with him but it didn't last long. Within two weeks, we were back together."

"So Barnes never..." Tony trailed off.

"No. We fought here and there but Bucky never...put his hands on me or anything."

"Oh."

"Are you asking because you want to see if you're worse than your parents' brainwashed killer?"

Tony doesn't say anything. He wants to say no but a part of him wants to say yes. Part of him wanted to think that maybe The Winter Soldier did worse. But he knew that wasn't the case. Even when Bucky was under Hydra, he never did what Tony almost did to Loki.

"Steve, you need to let me talk, okay?" Tony says in a low voice.

"Okay." Steve agrees.

Tony takes a deep breath.

"You didn't judge me the way everyone else did. You were the reason why Thor didn't kill me. You helped Loki get professional help. Once upon a time, I hated you because I felt your judgment but you always looked out for the best for everyone. I still struggle. Like fuck, I still struggle. And seeing Sigrid made it so fucking hard. Steve, you should have been there when Sigrid broke down. She thought I left because she was bad. I had to tell her." Tony speaks breathlessly. "Things are getting better. I'm sure you probably know Loki and I were sleeping together again. I figured Barnes told you. It stopped. Loki keeps his distance for the kids. But I just love those three so much. I'm trying. I really am."

"I know, Tony." Steve soothes him. "And you're doing great. Sam keeps me updated."

"I don't know how to thank you, Steve. You and Rhodey deserve the thanks."

"You just needed that extra hand."

"Nothing on the whole sleeping together thing?"

"Well, I won't say I approve because things are still broken. But it's for your own good."

"I know."

Tony is silent again for a long time before he finally asks a question.

"Will me and Loki come back together again?" Tony's voice almost cracks.

"I'm sure you two will. Not just because of the kids but because you two love each other."

"Just like Barnes came back to you?"

Steve doesn't say anything for a long time. "Yes."


	7. Thor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part 1

"What are they like?" Magni asked.

"Who?" Sigrid looked at him.

"Everyone."

"They're amazing even if they're kinda flawed."

"Tell me?"

"Mama has some issues but he'd do anything for us. Daddy is really smart but he makes mistakes. That's okay though because he really loves all of us and would rip his own heart out for us if he had to. I mean that literally too."

"And our brother?"

"He's only a baby but there's something calming about him. I feel he'll be a good man when he grows up. Just like you would have been."

Magni smiled. He has long ago left the living but he was never forgotten.

+

Tony paced back and forth. Making amends with everyone has been going fairly well. Some deeper than others. But this one. This was going to be the hard one. He knew he had to mend the ice with Thor. After all, they were technically family because of Loki and the kids.

"I can't do it." Tony decided

"What?" Sam arched an eyebrow. "You're being ridiculous."

"I mean he did technically about beat me to death."

"You know you have to though."

"Maybe I can skip it?"

"Really, Tony? Out of everyone you made amends with, Clint and Nat were probably the ones you could have skipped. Not your technically brother in law."

All Tony could do was groan.

+

"He's doing what?" Thor was taken back.

"According to Steve, Tony is going around, making amends with everyone." Carol repeated.

Thor stared for a moment.

"Good for him." Thor scoffed.

"You do realize you're the next one." Carol arched an eyebrow.

Thor spit out his drink.

"Absolutely not." Thor roared. "I want nothing to do with him."

"You need the closure, Thor." Carol's gentle voice soothed him.

"I...I don't know if I could handle it."

"You know you need to."

"Will you be there?"

"This is something you need to do on your own, Thor. With Tony."

"It was worth a shot."

"But if you want, I can wait at your house and make you that casserole of mine you like so much."

"Yeah?"

Carol smiled as she nodded. It wasn't much but it did make Thor feel so much more better.

"Thank you, Carol." Thor smiled a little.

"No problem, slugger." Carol smiled kindly.


	8. Tony

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part 2

The two sat in silence. Tony had been through some awkward situations; several involved Thor, but this had to be the most awkward situation he can remember being in recently. Thor clearly didn't want to be here. Tony wasn't an idiot. But it had to be done.

~

It had to be done. That's what Thor kept telling himself. Carol was right. It was something that needed to be dealt with. Not just for him but for Loki, Sigrid and Magnus. Especially Magnus. The boy didn't even know his own father. And Thor knew more than anyone that every boy needs his father.

+

"Do you think Thor is gonna kill Tony again?" Clint asked.

"What a way to start a conversation." Natasha rolled her eyes.

"No kidding." Sam choked on his drink.

Loki couldn't sit still. It was one of those rare days where everyone had some breathing to just sit around. It had been a while since those days. He needed the distraction. Sigrid had been taking longer naps and Magnus is starting to fuss more. The conversations around him eventually became like background noise because all he could think about was Thor and Tony. The last time Thor had been near Tony, Loki nearly lost one of them.

"It'll be okay, Loki." Carol's kind voice interrupted his thoughts. "I had a talk with Thor."

"Even though it isn't much, it does make me feel a little better." Loki lied.

Carol knew it wasn't the truth but she smiled as if it was.

+

"Hear me out." Tony finally spoke. "I am sorry but I also forgive you."

"Excuse me, Stark?" Thor nearly roared.

"Hey, I did a heinous thing but you could have committed a murder. Either way, we both hurt Loki."

Thor collected himself. He took a deep breath. As much as he was still furious with Tony, he realized he was right. So he backed off and allowed Tony to speak again. He promised Carol he would be calm enough to do this. For Loki and for the kids.

"I'm sorry. I won't tell you all my excuses for what I did. What I almost did. I'm sorry for ruining Sigrid. For Magnus not knowing his father. It doesn't matter because he's still a baby but it's as much as a crime as what I've done to Loki and Sigrid. I'm sorry for abandoning Sigrid. I'm sorry for relapsing. And I'm sorry for sneaking around with Loki. I know I was taking advantage but I didn't want to believe it. I wanted to believe I was still good for him, ya know? But sneaking around was as bad as hurting him the way I did. I'm trying, Thor. I really am." Tony cleared his throat.

Thor took a deep breath. He's still angry but even he has to admit that Tony has done his best and is still trying.

"Tony, I was angry at you for when it all started. Long before the kids became a thought then a blessing. But I swallowed it down because Loki changed for the better. He found love and he left behind rage. But when he broke down, I saw someone who wasn't my brother. Loki is stronger than this. Then just the way he cowered after everything broke. He went to a darker place than I have ever known. Sigrid is a child yet she knows the darkest side of living. She is a child yet she has these feelings of self loathing just like Loki did for a long time. But it was all because they loved you so much. But I will not deny that you have done so much for them too. That you hurt as much as you have hurt them. I can learn to let go of the anger as I once did long ago, Tony but forgiveness is another story. I will learn to trust you to be near your family again but I will not stop next time." Thor warned.

"I understand." Tony nodded.

"Thank you." Thor took out his hand.

"For what?"

"For being better."

Tony knew their relationship would never be the same but it was a start.

"Thank you for giving me a chance." Tony smiled as he took Thor's hand.

+

All was quiet when Loki heard a knock on the door. Sigrid was sleeping. Magnus was sleeping. He quietly left his sleeping children in their rooms and walked towards the door. He took a second to breathe and opened it.

"Hi." Tony awkwardly stood.

"Hi." Loki smiled. "How did it go?"

"Better than I thought. I generally was considering taking FRIDAY with me."

"You went with no protection?"

"I mean I'm trying to get him to ease up, Loki. FRIDAY would have made him madder."

"That's true."

"He's probably never gonna trust me again or even be my friend again but he'll slowly get over the anger. We won't be Thor and Iron Man together again but we can be tolerable. That's all I ask for."

Loki nodded. He knew Thor was going to be the hardest talk.

"You didn't have to do all that." Loki says.

"Yes, I did." Tony sighs. "For me and for you and the kids. Everyone didn't deserve all that mess. You know that."

"I know."

"I love you."

"I love you too, Tony."

As Tony turns to leave, Loki grabs his hand.

"Come in, Tony." Loki says.

"Okay." Tony nods.

+

"I'm proud of you." Carol smiles.

"Of which part?" Thor looks at her. "The no killing or the conversation?"

"All of it."

"You were right. I needed it."

"Always listen to a woman."

"Aye."

Carol caressed Thor's golden locks as he laid on her lap. Things were going to be tense for a while but whenever he was with her, he felt safe.

Just like Jane.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AND I FINALLY FINISHED THIS ONE.
> 
> P.S. Sorry for the absence. I was having a lot of writer's block. But I hope you enjoyed the end.
> 
> UNTIL NEXT TIME.


End file.
